Life, Male, Female, Pursuit of Happiness, Yoga, Society, Uncategorized

Sleep

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The woods are lovely dark and deep, but I’ve promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep, miles to go before I sleep.”

— Robert Frost

These lines were also the favourite of Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru. It talks about giving up on sleep and carrying on with life, in general. It’s a sort of self-motivation. Sleep has been termed as a luxury.

This activity, which consumes almost 1/4th of our life, is the key to happiness. It is the answer to the toughest questions. It is better than sex. In fact, sleep post-sex is better than sex (I have not experience yet: P). But sleeping immediately post-sex could be the worst thing ever. Talk, pretend, cuddle and just sleep. Okay.

The kind of clarity you get post-sleep, is magical. But sleep deprivation has become a state of life. There was a time before 2012, I used to get no-frills sleep. I used to sleep for a minimum of eight hours. I haven’t slept really well since the day I left hostel. My mind has never rested in peace since then. It’s always working.

The diverse purposes and mechanisms of sleep are the subject of substantial ongoing research. Sleep seems to assist with improvements in the body and mind. Research in the 21st century is investigating whether sleep is a period of maintenance for removing metabolic waste compounds from the brain. Post a good sleep, you look bright and feel bright.

Have you ever heard about the American band called R.E.M.? I love their song Losing My Religion. The song was a hot favourite on radio in UK. By the way, the full form of R.E.M. is rapid-eye movement. It is a form of sleep. Dreams occur only during R.E.M. But most of the dreams I’ve had were dreams with my eyes wide open.

The dream of becoming Corporate Leader, Leader who could individually do Sales, Marketing and Operation and become a triple threat in the performing years. I may not sleep till I become really awesome in these things. And I’m too self-critical to achieve awesomeness. Anything I do would be an inch less than awesome. So, sleep will always elude me.

But I’m still happy. My mind keeps getting excited about the day. The beauty of the early morning sun. The lessons I learned with my every project are so profound, that sleep eludes me. Yet, my eyelids don’t feel the heaviness. My soul sings as I’m a born singer.

Sleep eludes me because I’ll never let life elude me. I’ve seen politicians sleep in Parliament. I’ve seen my batch-mates sleep in class during the last period of the school. I’ve seen travelers sleep in the bus/train/flight or at the airports. I’m not one of those travelers who always carries a neck pillow with an eye mask tucked in. The idea is to sleep whenever you find a dull moment in your life.

Sigh. I don’t find any. That’s the best and the worst part of this beautiful life. But you also detest the time right before you go to sleep when you automatically think about all the things you want to forget. Sleep well.

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Indian Society, Parenting, Life, Male, Female, Uncategorized

Finding Freedom in being fluid (Just Maybe):

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In my delusional space of randomness, I often wonder about freedom. Am I really that free? Yes, I am living on my own. Yes, I take my own decisions when it comes to my life. Yes, I have chosen my own field of work and yes, I have chosen my own sexuality. But is it really true, especially the last choice?

I mean, rewind your life to the day you were born and your nani made halwa and daddy distributed ladoos in his office and mummy took out the stock of hand-knitted booties and caps. It was the day when the doctor declared, ‘It’s a boy’ or ‘It’s a girl’. I mean the bias starts creeping in from that moment on.

Nobody gave time for that ‘it’ to become a girl or a boy, the doctor declares it and we abide by it like a rule book for the rest of our lives. And if the declaration isn’t enough, we have an ardent conditioning taking place over the years —whether it’s in the form of clothes you are made to wear, or the gifts you’re given, or the uniform that you wear or the queue that you select or the washroom you use or the sitting posture on a bike or the type of perfume you wear — just about everything is gender-based and gender-biased.

A lot of people realize their sexuality late in life and often, are confused as kids. Confused because other kids were clearly boy or girl-oriented. But what if there was freedom to choose your identity yourself? What if you could choose whether you want to put yourself out as a boy or a girl or whatever you are comfortable with in your birth certificates, ration cards, driving licenses, passports, Aadhar cards, voting IDs, educational admission forms or the character certificates issued to you by your education institutes yourself? What if there was absolutely no conditioning of a patriarchal or matriarchal society around you when you were born and you were just declared a homo-sapiens and then with time, with no judgmental eyes or scathing remarks or benefits for some gender, would you choose your own sexuality? What if such boundaries were so fluid that it would ultimately boil down to own your choice? Some may call it being experimental, some may call it being characterless, I say you are just trying to figure out and that in true sense, is freedom. Could this possibly be the end to sexism and maybe foeticide, infanticide and many other such conflicts that plague humanity?

Since I am working in Lucknow for project (Duration is around 2weeks), I want to take this analogy of the “Bada Imam Bara” that I just went visiting. It has the famous bhul bhulaiya in it. So every passage has four entrance points, you get confused which route to take and it takes a whole lot of time to figure your way around, but to exit, it takes less than 30 seconds, if you have figured out the route.

Similarly, when it comes to sexuality, it may take some time — perhaps, a few years for some or a life time for others — but once you are sure of where you stand, it’ll take only a few seconds to take the right decision. And that right decision would mean freedom in every sense of the word.

Sounds crazy? Yeah I know…since when did being random make sense! But the day it does, we might just feel more connected, more rooted, more happy, more human. Just maybe.